an interlude / hauntings

last night

i had a dream we watched two infants burning in the top of a shopping cart

you

horrified mouth gaping open

from the back seat

that phone call

the holes between my words

gaping as wide

as the jaws of a crocodile

large

and loud

the riot in your mind

angry members of the crowd

booing and hissing

pumping their fists

and yet 

hiding behind a 'goodnight'

goodnight.

for the crowds go to sleep when you next open your eyes and tell me

good morning

good morning

how did you sleep?

do you love me?

i will hold you close

let me keep you warm

i was alone during the riots 

but you are here now

you are safe now

first 

you told me about the car accident

the almost one

and I'd had a dream about you taking my car

and nearly killing us

and then you told me about that suicide 'stay alive' symbol

on your wrist

and 

i can't remember if it was a dream

but

the animal of my body

tried to hang itself last night

while my mind did all it could

to fight back

the pending suicide

i am alive

i am alive

i am alive

but i wonder

how much time we spend in the dark

and why when you call

my cellphone acts as an iv

pumping pumping pumping blood back I to my veins

i remember

when i arrived in georgia

to an overflow of texts

and i thought my best friend was dead

goodnight

goodbye

i

am

haunted